Annual Tormenting

Well, it's that time of year again! Time to tease and torment my English friend with the Fourth of July, AKA, Independence Day!

I haven't always been that big about celebrating the Fourth of July. At least, not since I was a kid. I enjoy the food, and the picnics, and the summer weather, and the pretty fireworks. But that's about as far as my interest in this particular holiday goes. Still, I must confess, that since I've become friends with Mick, I have begun to look forward with much glee to this holiday! How I enjoy correcting him on the historical inaccuracies he learned as a boy back in England!

For instance, one year Mick told me that Yankee Doodle Dandee was written by the Confederates during the civil war. While I acknowledged that the Confederates did enjoy singing that song as a way of insulting the North, I was quick to point out that Yankee Doodle Dandee was actually written by the British during the American Revolution (or the American Rebellion, as they call it back in the UK).

One year Mick was complaining about Americans poor use of the English language. Normally I would agree with him, generally speaking (don't tell him that), but being as it was the week of Independence Day, I was inclined to disagree. His particular complaint was that Americans drop the 'h' when saying 'herb'. He complained with great annoyance that we were trying to sound like the French by dropping the 'h'. I responded by reminding him that were it not for the assistance of the French, the Americans would never have defeated the British during the American Revolution. So, Americans agreed to forever drop the 'h' from the word 'herb', in order to honor the sacrifices they made for us during that time. Heh heh heh! This is of course a ridiculous fiction, but it worked like a charm! The following is an exact quote of the outburst it incited from Mick:

"Oh, #*%^(#@@!! That's the biggest bunch %&$^(@#$ !! It's #*%)^ of rubbish @*%)$! @*#) bloody hell #*%()^%(!!!! Yankee @#*%( bunch of *%(^%()!!"

My favorite thing is to quote the lyrics from Johnny Horton's Battle of New Orleans (the American version, of course) to him! How I love to remind him how the bloody British ran squealing back to England with their tails between their legs!!

I get to pay him back in one week for an entire year of his smart ass, dry, English sense of humor that he frequently uses against me (and many other poor such Americans as myself, I'm sure). I love it!

Ah, it's all in good fun. He's a good friend, and I appreciate that he tolerates me giving him a week of hell once a year.